Never Mind That Captain America Speculation; We Need to Talk about Chris Evans’ Mustache

Another Avengers movie, another discussion about Chris Evans’ retirement — it’s old hat by now, so no one should be surprised by the actor’s ambiguous comments to the New York Times. It’s the blandest of interviews, with talk of tap-dancing — he wants to learn because it’s “awesome” — and other hobbies he’d eventually like to take up (sculpting, carpentry).

Whether or not he actually does retire this time isn’t the piece’s big reveal; his comments are as inconclusive as ever;

You want to get off the train before they push you off.”

the NYT adds that Evans has “no plans” to return to the franchise, and “expects” his Cap tenure to end with Avengers 4. When that actually does happen, we’ll definitely and properly mourn but for right now, our agony is focused on the more immediate loss …

… c’mon, man, this is serious! I’m talking about that gorgeous beard.

IT’S GONE.

For his Broadway debut in Kenneth Lonergan’s Lobby Hero (directed stateside by Trip Cullman). Evans has stripped down to mere mustache,

and yeah, it’s not an improvement. The role is that of a douchey cop and for that part, I do suppose this ‘stache is exactly right.

photo via NYT

Heartbreaking, though it

photo via NYT

is. A little shocking, too.

photo via NYT

I don’t know about you, but I’m ready to start my Friday drinking, now.

We still love you, Cap.

Cindy Davis

Cindy Davis

Cindy Davis has been writing about the entertainment industry for ​over eight years, and is the ​Editor-in-Chief at Oohlo, where she muses over television, movies, and pop culture. Previous Senior News Editor at Pajiba, and published at BUST.

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